courage you wanted him to have

A father was worried about his son, who was sixteen years old but had no courage at all. So the father decided to call on a Buddhist monk to train his boy.
　　The Buddhist monk said to the boy’s father, “You should leave your son alone here. I’ll make him into a real man within three months. However, you can’t come to see him during this period. ” 　　 　　Three months later, the boy’s father returned. The Buddhist monk arranged a boxing match between the boy and an experienced boxer. Each time the fighter struck the boy, he fell down, but at once the boy stood up; and each time a punch knocked him down, the boy stood up again. Several times later, the Buddhist monk asked, “What do you think of your child?” 　　 　　“What a shame!” the boy’s father said. “I never thought he would be so easily knocked down. I needn’t have him left here any longer.” 　　 　　“I’m sorry that that’s all you see. Don’t you see that each time he falls down; he stands up again instead of crying? That’s the kind of courage you wanted him to have.”

a wooden bowl

a wooden bowl
A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and a four-year-old grandson. The old man's hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered. The family ate together nightly at the dinner table. But the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and failing sight made eating rather difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor. When he grasped the glass often milk spilled on the tablecloth.
　　
　
　　
　　The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess. So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner at the dinner table. Since grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl.
　
　　
　　Sometimes when the family glanced in grandfather's direction, he had a tear in his eye as he ate alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food. The four-year-old son watched it all in silence.
　　
　　
　　One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly, “What are you making?” Just as sweetly, the boy responded, “Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and mama to eat your food from when I grow up.” The four-year-old son smiled and went back to work. The words so struck the parents that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done. That evening the husband took grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table.
　　
　　
　　For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled. Children are remarkably perceptive. Their eyes always observe, their ears always listen, and their minds always process the messages they absorb. If they see us patiently provide a happy home atmosphere for family members, they will imitate that attitude for the rest of their lives. The wise parent realizes that every day is being laid for the child's future.
　　
　　
　　
　　Let us all be wise builders and role models. Take care of yourself...and those you love...today, and everyday!
　　

love lights

I looked at my beautiful Christmas tree and sighed. It was time. The New Year was a week old and my tree still stood in the corner of our room with its collection of memories proudly displayed in a shower of colorful lights. I'd procrastinated long enough.

　　
　　I got up, went to the garage and hauled all the boxes into the room. The garland was the first to come down. The tree looked naked already. I took the large ornaments off next. They made a large pile on our bed. An hour later, our bed was covered with Christmas memories. Each pile contained an ornament along with its matching brothers and sisters from sets purchased many years ago.
　　
　　I prepared the boxes and carefully placed ornaments in their protective packaging, pausing every few minutes to admir a favorite. "Hey, little Santa!" I held the Santa from my childhood. "Thanks for being my friend for almost fifty years." He was a little ragged but still gives me a flood of wonderful memories. —Until next year, my dear friend."
　　
　　
　　There was a collection of handmade ones. My children made in their first years of school, more than twenty years ago. Made by tiny hands, they are far from perfect in design, but every year they go on my memory tree — memories of young giggles on Christmas morning and a smiling face when they handed them to me when I came home from work. "Look what we made, Daddy!"
　　”
　　
　　"Oh! It is beautiful. Let's find a special spot on the tree for it." Every year since, they are displayed.
　　
　
　　A few hours after I started, the filled boxes were back in the garage, the room was vacuumed and I sat staring at a barren corner. The room seemed so empty. It took me two days of work to assemble and decorate my tree, but only a few hours to take it apart.
　　My tree is a good marriage or a great friendship. Like the tree, they take a long time to assemble and decorate with memories, but can be torn down quickly. All it takes is an unkind word or a thoughtless act, and what once stood proudly in the glow of love comes tumbling down.
　　
　
　　
　　Every year I have to put my tree away, but not my marriage or friendships. I take great care of those. They get to glow in the corner of my life for as long as I live. I get to analyze my tree and find memories for a few weeks every year. I can do the same with the loves in my life every day. When I held the Santa, a flood of wonderful memories returned. The same happens when I hold my wife or see the smile of a friend across the room.
　　
　　
　　
　　Take great care of your friendships and your marriage. Once they come down, they aren't as easy to put back together as a Christmas tree, if at all. Stand them in that special spot in the corner of your heart and admire their glow.

salty coffee

He met her at a party. She was outstanding; many guys were after her, but nobody paid any attention to him. After the party, he invited her for coffee. She was surprised. So as not to appear rude, she went along.
　　
　　As they sat in a nice coffee shop, he was too nervous to say anything and she felt uncomfortable. Suddenly, he asked the waiter, "Could you please give me some salt? I'd like to put it in my coffee."
　　
　
　　
　　They stared at him. He turned red, but when the salt came, he put it in his coffee and drank. Curious, she asked, "Why salt with coffee?" He explained, "When I was a little boy, I lived near the sea. I liked playing on the sea ... I could feel its taste salty, like salty coffee. Now every time I drink it, I think of my childhood and my hometown. I miss it and my parents, who are still there."
　　
　　She was deeply touched. A man who can admit that he's homesick must love his home and care about his family. He must be responsible.
　　
　　
　　She talked too, about her faraway hometown, her childhood, her family. That was the start to their love story.
　　
　
　　
　　They continued to date. She found that he met all her requirements. He was tolerant, kind, warm and careful. And to think she would have missed the catch if not for the salty coffee!
　　
　　
　　So they married and lived happily together. And every time she made coffee for him, she put in some salt, the way he liked it.
　　
　　
　　
　　After 40 years, he passed away and left her a letter which said:
　　
　　My dearest, please forgive my life-long lie. Remember the first time we dated? I was so nervous I asked for salt instead of sugar.
　　
　　
　　It was hard for me to ask for a change, so I just went ahead. I never thought that we would hit it off. Many times, I tried to tell you the truth, but I was afraid that it would ruin everything.
　　
　　
　　Sweetheart, I don't exactly like salty coffee. But as it mattered so much to you, I've learnt to enjoy it. Having you with me was my greatest happiness. If I could live a second time, I hope we can be together again, even if it means that I have to drink salty coffee for the rest of my life.

It felt so good being back home

It felt so good being back home
A gentle breeze blew through Jennifer’s hair. The golden red sun was setting. She was on the beach， looking up at the fiery ball. She was amazed by its color， deep red in the middle， softly fading into yellow. She could hear nothing but the waves and the seagulls flying up above in the sky.
　　The atmosphere relaxed her. After all she had been through， this is what she needed. “It’s getting late，” she thought， “I must go home， my parents will be wondering where I am.”
　　
　　
　　She wondered how her parents would react， when she got home after the three days she was missing. She kept on walking， directing herself to bungalow 163， where she spent every summer holiday. The road was deserted. She walked slowly and silently. Just in a few hundred meters she would have been safe in her house.
　　
　　
　　
　　It was really getting dark now， the sun had set a few minutes before and it was getting cold too. She wished she had her favorite jumper on： it kept her really warm. She imagined having it with her. This thought dissipated when she finally saw her front door. It seemed different. Nobody had taken care of the outside garden for a few days. She was shocked： her father was usually so strict about keeping everything clean and tidy， and now.。。 It all seemed deserted. She couldn’t understand what was going on.
　　
　　
　　She entered the house. First， she went into the kitchen where she saw a note written by her father. It said： “Dear Ellen， there is some coffee ready， I went looking.” Ellen was her mother but - where was she？ On the right side of the hallway was her parents’ room. She went in. Then she saw her. Her mother， lying on the bed， sleeping. Her face looked so tired， as if she hadn’t slept for days. She was really pale. Jenny would have wanted to wake her up but she looked too tired to force her. So Jenny just fell asleep beside her. When Jennifer woke up something was different.。.she wasn’t in her mother’s room and she wasn’t wearing the old clothes she ran away in. She was in her cozy bed in her pajamas.
　　
　
　　
　　It felt so good being back home. Suddenly she heard a voice. “Are you feeling better now， dear？ You know you got us very， very scared.”

So even if you've lost something, let it go and move on

So even if you've lost something, let it go and move on
There once was a master who went to India. In those times, we didn't have the communications or airplanes or many kinds of transportation that we do now. So the master went to India on foot. He had never been to India before; perhaps he came from Persia. And when he got there, he saw a lot of fruit. In India they have plenty of fruit to sell, but much of it is expensive because they can't grow much due to the water situation. So he saw one basket, a big basket of some very red, long fruit. And it was the cheapest in the shop, not expensive at all.
　　
　　So he went up and asked, "How much per kilo?" And the shopkeeper said, "Two rupees." Two rupees in India is nothing; it's like dirt. So he bought a whole kilogram of the fruit and started eating it. But after he ate some of it: Oh, my God! His eyes watered, his mouth watered and burned, his eyes were burning, his head was burning and his face became red. As he coughed and choked and gasped for breath, he jumped up and down, saying, "Ah! Ah! Ah!"
　　
　　
　　But he still continued to eat the fruit! Some people who were looking at him shook their heads and said, "You're crazy, man. Those are chilies! You can't eat so many; they're not good for you! People use them as a condiment, but only a little bit to put into food for taste. You can't just eat them by the handful like that; they're not fruit!" So the stupid master said, "No, I can't stop! I paid money for them, and now I'll eat them. It's my money!"
　　
　　
　　And you think that master was stupid, right? Similarly, we sometimes do a lot of things like that. We invest money, time or effort in a relationship, business or job. And even though it's been a long time, bitter experience tells us it won't work, and we know there's no more hope that things will change in the future - this we definitely know by intuition - we still continue just because we've invested money, time, effort and love into it. If so, we're kaput in the brain. Just like the man who ate the chilies and suffered so much but couldn't stop because he didn't want to waste the money he'd paid.
　　
　　
　　So even if you've lost something, let it go and move on. That's better than continuing to lose.

What does a woman want?

Once a man confessed, "The great question I have not been able to answer is What does a woman want?" Many husbands and boyfriends wonder the same thing today. But modern psychologists—and women—know the answer. A woman wants most everything a man wants: success, power, status, money, love, marriage, children, happiness, and fulfillment.
　　
　　
　　Women need to communicate this more clearly. Here are five things that should be told to men.
　　
　
　　
　　1. Women need genuine, personal displays of affection .
　　
　
　　
　　The breed of women who lives off the expensive gifts a man gives her is vanishing. A woman who values love for its own sake tends to be wary of gifts that are too costly. An expensive gift can make her feel that a man is trying to buy her affections and sees her as a prize rather than a person.
　　
　　
　　Gifts that give women genuine pleasure are those with a personal touch-an item of clothing, for example—because such gifts, when chosen properly, are statements of caring and high form of flattery, demonstrating recognition of a loved one's special tastes. The best gifts, from a woman's point of view, are those that are on going, rather than flamboyant. In fact, what's missing from a lot of lives is romance, such as doing small chores for her, sharing a laugh with her. These are the "gifts" that really count.
　　
　　2. Women need a sympathetic ear .
　　A simple conversation can be different event to a man and a woman. For a man, a conversation is a way to define a problem, debate the rights and wrongs, and find a solution. To do that, he may repeatedly interrupt the woman until she "understands" the point he's making. But a woman would rather have a friendly ear from a man, instead of advice. Women more often view conversation as a way of sharing their emotions with the listener. They talk until they feel better. A man who wants to get through to a woman conversationally needs to tap into emotions rather than solutions. And, often, that can mean just listening.
　　
　　
　　3. Women don't fall in love as easily as men do .
　　
　
　　
　　Men tend to be romantics, often falling in love more quickly than women, who tend to focus on practical considerations in choosing a mate. Women are looking for long-term qualities in a partner. Far more than men, they allow their heads to control their hearts. Even though women may ache for love, they carry around an inner evaluator who asks, Can I count on this man? So any man who hopes to sweep a woman off her feet had better lengthen his timetable, and pay as much attention to characteristics such as kindness and dependability as he does to his hair, his clothes and his adaptability.
　　
　　4. Women are good problem-solvers .
　　
　
　　
　　Men and women solve problem in different ways. A man tends to be direct—line up all his options, select one, then proceed. Women are more likely to simply let problems solve themselves-for example, by giving a child more time to adjust to a new teacher, rather than insisting on an immediate classroom change.
　　
　　
　　
　　5. A woman wants to be friends with her husband .
　　
　　
　　"Few women relish being a mother, secretary or general picker-upper for their husbands. A woman wants the man in her life to be a true equal, someone who respects her strength, treats her weaknesses with kindness, and expects her to be the same for him. In short, she wants a friend, a lover and a partner who understands her.